Carla Jalbert

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FYI: Suffering is optional

I am embarrassed to say that my biggest problem right now is how I am feeling about my UberMom driving responsibilities. (Total first world problem, I agree!) I have a working car, I can afford gas, and I have two healthy children who need to be chauffeured to different schools and their various activities. There are some days I am in the car for 3.5 hours. I’ve been doing this for years. It seems to only be really bothering me of late. Perhaps it is the fact that my driving job for one of my children is winding down, as she is about to turn 16….perhaps I need to do some more yoga and meditate. Regardless, I am dismayed that with all my Dali Mama quotes in my head, I am still letting it bother me.

I know this isn’t a real problem (I have had those in my life), but the fact that I am letting it bother me is a problem. If we learn how to deal with these little guys, then we can move more smoothly through the big stuff when it hits. This week’s meditation helps us to change our response to the issues at hand. As Buddha says, “Pain is Inevitable. Suffering is optional.” 

Rather than to continue to suffer and take my resentment out on my fellow drivers by showing less Aloha, I meditate on ACCEPTING the situation for what it is. Eckart Tolle states, “Accept—then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it…this will miraculously transform your whole life.” One of the best ways for me to ACCEPT is to practice gratitude. I give thanks for my car, money for gas to drive my kids, the fact that I have my kids, that my kids are at the right schools and are healthy…etc., etc. An attitude of gratitude DOES help in shifting my response. I also meditate on releasing my resistance to the situation. I then fill myself in with the trust and knowing that everything is as exactly as it should be. I only have a few years left with both my kids. I want to know that I was truly PRESENT for them by focusing on the moment together in each and every moment.

Whew! I feel better already. 

I  know that I have practiced for the real issues when they arrive…may I handle them with more grace and aloha! But, I am not going to give the future one more thought...I am off to pick up my son!